T Party

T party is my “new group.”  Background:  Social and support groups are popular with trans people.  Here in the Boston area we have several choices of organized groups.  Every now and then someone gets the idea that they can do things better and they start a new group.  That’s me now!

Here’s the link to my new group:  http://upcoming.yahoo.com/group/3969/

That’s me now, but it’s a rather slow now.  I created the group some time ago, haven’t done much with it, and don’t have many members yet.  My first effort at publicizing it was mentioning it at the end of my holiday email that I sent to lots of people.  I’m still not quite done sending these out yet, but I’ve sent 180 or so, I think, and have only had a few people sign up.  It’s a little less than I expected, but ok, it’s fair enough.  My announcement was buried at the end of a lengthy impersonal email.  I’m sure lots of people didn’t even read that far.  Also, I announced it with the disclaimer that it wasn’t really ready for operation yet.  And then, there’s this other little detail that people think of a “group” as having evening outings led in person by the group leader, and, people who know my situation know that that isn’t possible for me currently.  Some probably think this is an impossible and bizzare fantasy of mine.

Well, maybe, but I’m not convinced yet.  Here’s the status of my group:

Membership is all of seven people besides me.

Content consists of two posts I’ve made to the discussion board, covering justification for starting the group and what kind of membership activity I am hoping for.

So far none of the seven have done anything with it that I know of.

Content I’m planning on adding:

• Transportation issues
• Budget issues–what people are willing to spend on an activity
• Sexuality and behavior
• Proper dress
• Venue selection
• Meeting times
• Examples of special interests
• Notes on using upcoming.yahoo.com

I did some experimentation with that last one yesterday.  I really liked most of what I discovered about using upcoming.  I do think it’ll be a great fit for my ideas.  After I get a more complete set of content posted, I’ll start encouraging people to experiment with getting involved.  It’ll take some time.  I think it’s going just fine so far.

First Event

Well shoot, I have to say something about First Event.  Yes, I missed it badly.  I looked at a number of pictures, read some posts about it, heard reports from a few friends.  Next year, next year.

Pigtails

I wore my hair in pigtails last night! It was fun and silly. I was inspired by one of the characters in the movie “All About My Mother”. My after-work routine generally involves changing out of my nice black wig and into one of my older ones, in hopes of minimizing wear on this one and making it last longer. Last night I was going to be doing some dresser drawer organizing and wanted to do something to keep my hair out of my face so on a whim, I reproduced the look from the movie as best I could. I love so much creating an unexpected wonder out of lots of little things that would otherwise never enter conscious thought. Mm, and I suppose I also like to show off a bit. In this case, I was showing off only for my roommates, Stacy, Jessica, and Kate. They all wear their hair in the same boring, simple, zero-effort way every day. A few days ago while cleaning I found a package of twin bead pony tail holders. I set them on top of Stacy’s hair stuff where she and Jessica could see them and waited for a reaction. There had been none so I decided they were fair game for play. I used my older Adriana wig, which I often sleep in now. It’s a monolith of frizz that I would never wear in public, but which is perfectly adequate for chores around the house. I brushed it out as best I could, snapped on the pony tail holders in the approximate position, stretched the contraption over my head, brushed and made little adjustments, and I was cute! For makeup, I applied some blush to my bare cheeks. My lips were still red from the long wearing lip color I’d worn during the day. And completing the look, I changed into a blue plaid gingham shirt, absurdly large at size 20. All this stuff, discarded and forgotten, raw material for a fun little after-school art project.

Relapse

Horror!

Yesterday at work I was sitting at my desk, deep in thought over something or other, needed to pee, and so without breaking my train of thought, got up and walked in the restroom, unzipped, and…problem.  There was my shapewear in the way.  My mind then tumbling back to reality, I looked up and found myself standing in front of a urinal.  Oh CRAP, what was I doing in the MEN’S room?!!!  Back out the door in an instant, look both ways.  WHEW—the hallway was empty.  No witnesses.

Where the heck did that come from?

Orientation

Orientation

A skit for four people

by Sonia Keys

 

Players

Man: A man of typical appearance

Woman: A woman of typical appearance

CD: An obvious crossdresser—a man dressed as a woman

FTM: Also very obviously, a woman dressed as a man

	Players stand in order from stage left to stage right: FTM, CD, Woman, Man.
Man	I’m straight. I like women.
Woman	I’m gay. I have no interest in men.
CD	I’m straight. No men, please.
FTM	I’m gay. Lisa and I were in love before I transitioned, and now we’re more in love than ever.
	Man and Woman move to side of stage. CD and FTM take center stage, moving around enough to indicate that they are now speaking as new characters.
CD	I’m gay. I like my girlfriends well hung.
FTM	I’m straight. And my wife likes that I’m the man of the house.
CD	(changes pose to again indicate a new character.) I’m straight. A pretty woman in a dress and heels catches my eye every time.
FTM	(changes pose.)I’m gay. I only relate to women, they way they respond and communicate.
	CD and FTM move to side of stage. Man and woman take center stage.
Man	I’m gay. The way men walk, they way they pose. It just turns me on.
Woman	I’m so straight. A broad smile on a scruffy face just drives me crazy!
Man	(Changes pose and pauses to take on a serious expression.) I was born female. I’m stealth now. I’m finally the straight male I always knew I should be.
Woman	(Somberly.) I hated being a boy. I owe my very life to my parents for letting me transition as a teen. I was born to be a lesbian and shudder to think of any other life.
	CD and FTM join Man and Woman so the four are again center stage.
CD	I was born in the wrong body. I dream of being a delicate flower, and having dinner on the table when my husband gets home from work.
FTM	I identify with gay men and the whole gay culture. Being a gay male is what I feel.
Man	My sexual orientation is what I’m attracted to. But it’s not a simple answer of gay or straight.
Woman	I can tell you I’m gay or straight, but that doesn’t tell you much about what attracts me, does it?

 

End

 

Ella’s puzzle

The answer to Ella’s puzzle is person 3. She didn’t want to tell the answer last night, so I kept quiet until I’d slept too. I can’t resist now!

Transprejudice

First I must refer you, gentle reader, to someone else’s blog post on this subject. Mercedes Allen posted a wonderfully lucid article on this at The Bilerico Project yesterday. Go read it. Now.

Back?  Good.  She had great examples in her article, and yet there is no end to the number of ways we display prejudice within the trans community. I cringe every time I hear the phrase “just a crossdresser.”  Just?  So a crossdresser is “less than” …what?

I grimace when my friends argue over “proper dress,” dressing to blend, or pass, or whatever.  They are arguing over what they think a person is “supposed to do.”  Says whom?  What about what the person wants to do?

I went off once, on a mailing list when someone was deploring the presence of sex workers at TG bars.  I started a lengthy paragraph with “Check your prejudices at the door and consider that these girls are your sisters…”

In a stimulating conversation I just had with Stacy about all of this, she mentioned “positive prejudices.”  I think these are all illusive.  Exoticizing, for example, is a form of objectifying.  It’s not really a good thing.

We talked a lot about the origins of prejudice.  She said that prejudice is something you learn from others, and often in the complete absence of any representatives of the class of people being prejudged!  We talked about how prejudice requires a person to have a concept of the class as opposed to the individual.  Interaction with, or even exposure to, individuals gets in the way of prejudice.

Snowball

Learning is a lifelong process, you know?

I thought I knew what a snowball was, then, just because I’m that kind of person, I went and fact checked my concept at Urban Dictionary before I started this post. And that’s when I learned something! I knew a snowball when a person gives a blow job to ejaculation, and then passes the cum, mouth to mouth, back to the person who just received the blow job. It made enough sense to me. It’s white in color. You get hit with something that, um…many people would think you wouldn’t want to get hit with. Spitball, snowball, I dunno, I thought it was a cute term.

So, Urban Dictionary likes that definition okay, but even higher rated is a somewhat different definition: passing cum back and forth by mouth so that it mixes with saliva and snowballs in volume. Uh huh! That’s something a little different.

I was planning to post how I gave one of these recently and thought I had room for improvement in my technique. See, it was my partner’s first. She (uh, yes, a “fully functional” she) commented on the volume of it all. That made me self conscious, thinking that the object is to transmit the cum, not saliva. So I made mental notes for next time. The trick must be to swallow as much saliva as possible right at that last instant just before my parter comes. That way the cum doesn’t get diluted.

Now that I’ve been educated, I guess I gave more of a first definition snowball, and, I guess there’s nothing wrong with that.

The mental note is still useful. A larger repertoire is always a good thing.